Enigma by crystalflake34

Enigma is a fan fiction by crystalflake34

Beginning with the book cover, I didn't find it that attractive. It could have been better, much better than what is there presently. I would make one more suggestion, try selecting those fonts which are more visible like Courier New or  League Gothic.

Next thing is the prologue. it sounded interesting and it gave a detailed version of what the story is going to be like.  Again I would like to make a suggestion. In the end, it is already revealed that MI6 has appointed Niall to kill Harry. But wasn't that supposed to be a secret? That's the entire point in mystery/Thriller stories right? So I think, changing it would be more preferable. It would even shock the readers when they come to know about it

Regarding the chapter, I think it was written very well. The sentence construction was nicely done. There was a flow to the chapter which I really liked. There are a few mistakes regarding grammar and use of some words, like for example in the second paragraph it's, 'slam someone in the stomach' but as far as I think, you don't slam but you punch them. Fixing these mistakes would make the story really good.

The details and thoughts are well connected as well but I would prefer writing into more detail. Personally, I like reading stories that has a detailed description of the scenes. So maybe doing this would benefit the story a lot. As I always suggest, visualizing the scene while writing helps a lot.Also, I would suggest shortening the length of the paragraphs. They are way too big, just making them into two separate paragraphs would solve the problem.

Overall, I think this story could be great if the small mistakes are rectified. It has a lot of potential to grow.

Check it out here: http://www.wattpad.com/story/4190411-the-enigma-a-one-direction-fan-fiction

-SJ